Review: God’s Puzzle (Kamisama no Puzzle)

Posted by Kevin Ouellette on May 31, 2009 8:17pm EDT (3 years ago)

Filed under: Drama, Sci-Fi, Movie reviews

Review: God’s Puzzle (Kamisama no Puzzle)

For all you fervent Takashi Miike completionists out there who get upset that only most of his films get released in the west and not of all of them (yet), I offer up God’s Puzzle as irrefutable evidence that the man is still capable of churning out a clunker from time to time, regardless of the big budget and relentless PR campaign it initially had behind it. As a huge science fiction fan, this film seemed to have the potential to finally break the trend in Japanese sci-fi of presenting the end result with no tangible explanation, such as time slips, alternate worlds, etc. Unfortunately, in the earnest attempt to offer up sufficient explanations of its incredibly complex subject-matter—the creation of the entire freaking universe—more than half the movie boils down to a confusing theoretical physics lesson. Oh, and the other half ain’t so hot either.

When a college student named Kiichi (Hayato Ichihara) decides to skip out on class to go traveling with a girl, he convinces his twin brother, the dimwitted wannabe rocker Motokazu (also Ichihara), to sit in for him. The task seems easy enough: just endure a few physics lectures without making an ass of himself and pick up Kiichi’s diploma in a few weeks. Assured that the cute girl in class, Shiratori (Rio Matsumoto), is single, Motokazu finally agrees and sets out on his mission. Unfortunately the plan goes a bit off-track when Ms. Hatomura (Yuriko Ishida) asks Motokazu to go convince a reclusive genius named Saraka Homizu (Mitsuki Tanimura) to at least come into class for a little while before graduation even though the university was going to give her a diploma either way.

Born a test tube baby, 17-year-old Saraka helped design the world’s first “crosstron” particle accelerator. Dubbed “Infinity” for its shape being similar to the infinity symbol, the gigantic contraption is actually capable of creating basic cells from scratch. Motokazu doesn’t have much luck getting through to the eccentric Saraka until he repeats a confusing idea he got from an older student named Hashizume (Takashi Sasano) earlier in the day—that it might be possible to recreate the conditions that led to the creation of the universe. Saraka is of course intrigued, in part because she’s probably the only person on Earth actually capable of understanding such a thing, but also with a misguided ulterior motive in mind. Eventually, after a very, very long classroom discussion on the science involved, Motokazu is forced into teaming up with Saraka to prove that it’s possible, with the rest of the class tasked with proving it’s not possible in a winner-takes-all final class project (A for being right, F for being wrong). Ever-forlorn Saraka is less concerned with grades as she is with actually following through with her theory, however, and becomes convinced that the only way to make sense of her pointless, test tube-created life is to threaten universal annihilation and force God to put a stop to her in person. Oh, kids these days.

The idea of creating a new universe from scratch initially seemed so cool. It sort of suggested some sort of nerdgasmic cross between Weird Science and Stargate SG1 where two crazy teens could type some parameters into a laptop and create alternate universes to hop through. Instead, it transitions straight from unapologetically boring scientific jargon to mundane threat-of-disaster flick. Sure, destroying the universe is pretty damn epic in theory, but the cinematic conventions used for that are no different than if the goal was to defuse a bomb or stop the outbreak of a deadly virus—you pretty much know how it’s going to end either way.

Did I mention the jargon is boring? It’s so boring the camera itself seems to get bored, constantly veering away from whoever is talking to slowly trace up and down Mitsuki Tanimura’s body. Speaking of Tanimura, erotic camerawork aside, her performance is one of the only redeeming aspects of this film. It’s a shame she’s had a run of big roles in lame projects lately, because she actually shows genuine acting chops in the dramatic scenes and has the potential to be one of the most interesting young film actresses around. It can’t be easy working alongside a chronic overactor like Ichihara, but she manages to steal the show and add some legitimacy to scenes that would have otherwise been laughable for all the wrong reasons.

Consider this less of a review than a warning. Chances are this film will never get a legitimate release in the west, and I’d even go as far as to say that if a label does end up releasing it, it would only be to exploit the ever-expanding fan base that will buy anything with Miike’s name attached. You’d be better off not wasting your time seeking this one out, though. The attempt to explain the origin of the universe during the course of a 2+ hour film while still keeping it entertaining was valiant, but ultimately futile.

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